I believe that children can suffer more harm by their parents’ incessant fighting, a home filled with hostility, and all of the accompanying tension in a home where the parents cannot get along, than living through a peaceful mediated divorce where the parents ultimately become happier people and more supportive parents.
Divorce mediation can establish a method for parents to communicate effectively with each other. Establishing methods of communication is one example of how parents can work with each other, become better parents, and participate jointly in their children’s lives without the fighting, animosity and hostility.
Divorce mediators should realize that parents have a lifetime of joint decisions and participation ahead of them as their children grow up and have children of their own. The open and respectful communication that may start as a result of mediating your divorce, may encourage divorced parents to attend the events in their children’s lives—concerts, little league games, swim meets, graduations, recitals, weddings—without the stress that existed before a mediated divorce resolved the family’s issues in a manner that suited that particular family.
Effective divorce mediation can take the fight out of a divorce and save the children from the fallout. By eliminating the contention and constant fighting found in some courtroom divorce proceedings, mediation eases the tension for everyone concerned, especially the children.
While no divorce is easy on anyone, eliminating the contention of a typical divorce—where each parent hires his or her own lawyer to fight it out—by utilizing a divorce mediator, both parents can move forward, rebuild their lives, gain the skills or infrastructure to communicate with each other effectively, and ultimately ease the children’s lives.
Mediation is not just a method for reaching a divorce settlement, it is a tool for establishing methods of working with each other to make joint decisions that will encourage better habits and success in their children. By replacing the hatred for each other with the need to raise their children to be respectful, well-rounded adults, divorce mediation results in long-term benefits for all parties, especially the children.
Please send me your comments and ideas:[email protected].
Source: Cory J. Rosenbaum, P.C., a professional corporation for the practice of injury, employment and matrimonial law. For more information or to schedule a consultation, call 212-732-7922 (NYC office) or 516-670-9332 (Uniondale office), or visit CoryRosenbum.com, PreDivorceLaw.com and NonToxicDivorce.com.
